Every week I re-evaluate my decision to attend college at a less than traditional age.  For me, it comes down to two things: my family and my heart.  I want to set a great example for my children so they pursue higher educaction and work toward rewarding lives for themselves. I also want to have the means to provode for my wife and children to the greatest of my ability. I want to have those memories that last a lifetime, and a college degree will hepl put me into the financial position to do so.

The other, perhaps equally inportant reason is that I believe I have found my calling in life.  I want to be a health care provider at Mayo Clinic, an institution that I believe does and will continue to lead the world in health care.  I truly want to be a valuable part of this institution, and feel that I have much to offer.  Beginning college after my tenure in the military is the first step.

While I was a medic in the Army, our motto was:"so that others may live."  Dr. Mayo's words "The needs of the patients are the only ones in which to be considered," move me deeply, and serve as one of my may motivating factors for entering college.

Well, I finally made it through a weekend that I have been dreading for 18 years, my daughter's senior prom.  When the day came, al of the nerves seemed to give way to feelings of joy.  This was a special day for her, and the smile on her face will be etched in my mind forever. It served as one more reminder that my little girl was growing up. AND I STILL AM NOT SOLD ON IT 100%!  However, this is't about me, its about the fine young lady that my daughter has become. I am so proud of her, and it seems the older she gets, the more the things my dad told me makes sense.  It's funny how that works.

To my daughter, Natasha: I want you to never forget how much you are loved, and how blessed I am to have you as my daughter.This is going to be a year of endings, and of new beginnings. You are about to graduate high school, visit Europe and begin college.  There are going to be times that you feel alone, but you never will be.  I hope all of your dreams come true!  -Dad

The celebration of the 100th anniversary of birth of Kim Il Sung, the man that brought communism and the resulting famine to North Korea, has proven to be an example of faulty logic.  Following World War 2, the United States and the Soviet Union had a dispute over which would control this stregic penninsula.  It was the United States that decided the nation should be divided by the 38th parallel. The South Koreans would be a democracy while the North Koreans would turn toward a communist dictatorship led by Kim Il Sung.  To the Koreans, either was an improvement over the 35 plus years of Japanese rule. However, in order to keep the North Koreans loyal, the regime of Kim Il Sung would need to isolate his people from the rest of the world.   

In time, the people of North Korea were indoctrinated to consider Kim Il Sung as a sort of demigod.  As someone sent from the heavens.  It was even tought that the man was born atop a mountain and never went to the bathroom. For decades, this fanaticism persisted.  It has survived through the rule of his son, and now grandson.

But the threads appear to be unraveling. With widespread famine and increased difficulty to control social media, the truth is certain to sweep across this nation soon.  It was over this past weekend that the regime had yet another catastrophic failure when it defied the United Nations and attempted to fire a ballistic rocket.  This rocket failed after two minutes.  It may take some time in certain circumstances, but faulty reasoning will ultimately come back to the perpetrator. And when it does, credibility is destroyed.

The Glass Castle

While reading The Glass Castle, I experienced a wide range of emotions.  When I began reading, I wondered how Jeanette could allow her mother to dig through a dumpster.  I initially had the impression that she was ashamed of her parents. As the book progressed, I developed a feeling of sadness for Jeanette and her siblings and a genuine disgust for her parents. I wondered how any parent could treat their children with such disregard as Mr. and Mrs. Walls did. I could not figure out why the Jeanette maintained such affection for her father, even when he treated her with complete selfishness.  As I read further, Rex Walls spoke to Jeanette in such a way that it was apparent how much he did love her.  On the other hand, Mrs. Walls maintained a sense of apathy toward her children throughout the book.

The Glass Castle was a great story with a great message: Through hard work and motivation, children born into poverty are not condemned to this life as adults.  These hardships can serve as the driving force behind their success.  I would definately recommend this book to others, and have.  I believe that we can all get caught up in self pity, and this book is a good reminder that people can rise above anything.

Knowing Who We Are

At one time or another we all have wondered about a relative that we heard stories about, but never had the chance to meet.  For me, the stories my grandmother told me about her father really made me wonder what this man looked like.  I had an image of him in my mind, but had never seen a photo of him.  I knew that he must have been quite a handsome man since my grandmother had told me that I looked a bit like him.  I had asked to see photos of him, but my grandmother always said that they were packed away and that she would look for them later.  Sadly, later never came.  My grandmother passed away in 1998, and I would need to wait about 10 more years before I would be able to put a face to all of those wonderful stories.

In about 2008, I was visiting my grandfather and he asked if I wanted to go through a box of photos with him.  I assumed they were photos of my cousin and I growing up.  As I opened the box and searched through the contents, I noticed these were much older photos than I had anticipated.  There were many faces that I did not recognize.  I sat for hours with my grandpa looking over these old photos and hearing his stories of the people in the pictures.  Eventually, I did find a photo of a man that resembled my grandma.  I was told this was my great grandfather.  At last, the elusive face of Elmer Fritsch was revealed to me. I felt such joy in seeing this photo that I wanted to see how far I could trace my ancestry.  This has since become a passion for me.  I want to gather as much information as I can to pass it to my children.  This is who they are,  and I want them to know as much as they can. 

Since beginning my quest of ancestral knowledge, I have traced my family back twelve generations in some branches.  I am very proud of this.  It has taken many hours of searching records, asking family members about their memories, and requesting copies of any photos they may have.  I then thought that I would try to trace my wife's family tree.  I thought this would be a much more daunting task since her family is from South Korea.  So, I began my quest by asking her aunt for any information.  I was shocked when she pulld out a book that traced their family back seventy six generations.  That means that my daughter, Myla, is generation seventy seven, and it is all recorded.  I absolutely love that my wife's family holds their heritage in such high regard that all of her ancesters are remembered.  It is a quality that I hope my children pass on to their children.

Distractions and Motivation Part 2

As  this semester races forward, I am still struggling with the same distractions common to most students and parents.  It seems there is always a deadline to be met or a paper to be completed. I find myself feeling as if I am forgetting to do something quite often.  Sometimes this can feel overwhelming. This is especially true when it is coupled with the rigors of everyday parenthood.  The normal bumps and bruises, sniffles and teething of a growing 13 month old seem unending.  And this is a walk through the park when compared to the mood swings of an 18 year old girl and the realization that she will soon be out on her own and attending college herself.

The progression of my daughters through their respective changes is what keeps me motivated to do well in school.  I want to serve as a good example that you can achieve your goals by working hard and persevering.  The ability to better provide for my family financially is also a great motivating factor. It is through furthering my education that I will be able to do this.  I often heard my parents say that they wanted to provide for us kids more than they had.  I always felt like I had enough in my childhood.  However, I now understand what they meant.

My daughter, Myla, recently celebrated her first birthday.  It was truly a time of celebration.  It was a day for our entire family to gather and celebrate the first year of a beautiful little girl. It was also a day of blending cultures.  My wife and her family are originally from South Korea, whereas my family is 100 percent European.

  

Our house was filled with the usual decorations that most of us associate with a child's first birthday celebration.  Balloons, pink streamers, gifts wrapped in bright colors, and of course a birthday cake. However, upon further examination you would begin to notice the Korean culture. Assorted colorful candies made of soy are stacked high to represent a long life.  Traditional Korean seaweed soup is also on the menu to represent the difficulties the mother endured during childbirth. (The soup is given to the mother during her recovery.) The entire counter top is filled with Korean dishes, as well as more traditional American favorites. 

Myla greeted her guests in a white birthday dress and a hat with pink furry trim and tassel.  Immediately after the singing "Happy Birthday" and eating her cake, she was taken away by her mother and grandmother.  A space was cleared on the floor and several items were laid out on a mat.  A pencil, string, a book, money, and rice were a few of the items.  After a few minutes, Myla made her grand re-entrance, this time wearing a traditional Korean dress.  She was placed on the mat, in front of the items.  Now it was time to see which items would be chosen. The first was the money.  This is supposed to predict financial stability for my daughter.  The second was the book, which represents intelligence.  The final item chosen was the string.  This one represents long life.  So, I have hope that my daughter will have a long career as a cardiologist!

I believe that my daughter's life will be greatly enriched by being a part of both cultures.  There are many differences in American and Korean cultures.  However, it is very apparent how much our children are celebrated in each.